Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Slow down the clock

During dinner I sat quietly watching Nathan.  I so desperately wanted to capture that one moment of him and savor it.  Even more than the oh-so-delicious chocolate cake I made last night!  He was taking FOREVER to eat dinner because he was sharing so much of his precious mind with us. It started with, "I think we should have two more people come and stay with us for a while." This is obviously to fill up the two empty seats at the end of the table.  I must say that he has taken over the head of the table, quite priceless!  Then he adds, "How long will we eat at the dining room table?"  Well, tonight it would seem like forever, but I'm not sure what he was getting at with that.  One bite of chicken followed by about two or three life pondering questions.  I love his brain.  Love, love, love it!

I just wanted to somehow put him in one of those amber filled compartments like they put bugs in.  You know, the ones you find at fancy jewelry stores or science museums.  But I want to keep him alive and not lose this moment at the same time.  How can I do that?  How can I continue to watch him grow but keep up with where he is right now and all the amazing things he's doing right now?  It's like he's growing into this absolutely incredibly amazing little person right in front of me and there's nothing I can do to stop it and nothing I can do to record it all and I don't want to miss any of it.  And I know there's Brady right next to him doing the exact same thing-even faster!  Brady is growing at warp speed.  I looked over at him tonight and couldn't believe his legs were so long and we're almost out of diapers FOREVER and the crib has been gone for a year now.   My baby is not my baby, but yay, he still sucks his thumb & will not relinquish his bunny for anything-there's still some baby left in him!  I may regret saying that!  

They have to grow up, I know that.  I'm beyond thankful for that gift of life, of renewed hope that I thought I lost five years ago.  They are my gifts from God and I am so grateful.  Right now I am typing this one-handed as Brady sits on my knee and laughs hysterically at his favorite show, Funniest Home Videos.  I fully expect to see our family on there one day.  I love watching this with them, Brady's cackle is contagious-inherited from his wonderful daddy and he throws his head back after each video.  One of them will even say, "That'll leave a mark" after someone gets banged up. As I'm holding him I can feel his stomach contract just before each one because he's getting ready to laugh.  At each commercial he says, "Are Funniest Videos over?"  And we say, "No," and he just laughs and laughs. Life is good.  Does it get better than this?  Oh yeah, the tickle monster must attack... 

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